Never Eat Alone Summary
Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi is a great book for learning networking and relationships. This book packs full of tips, advices and anecdotes from his personal life. Some people complain about his style of writing and think that he is bragging thru the whole book, but I think if you have a positive mind, then you won’t needle picking any negative points. Think positively about how many new tips and advices you can learn from this book.
Ferrazzi’s main idea is that instead of cold, calculating, traditional networking, you should make genuine friends. First make friends, he says, then make them clients. The more people you know, the more opportunities will come your way, and the more help you’ll get. Your circle of influence will widen naturally.
Reciprocity is not only emphasized from his book, but also a ageless principle for influence and networking with people. Success in any field is about working with people, not against them. Sharing our knowledge and resources, time and energy, friends and associates, and empathy and compassion in a continual effort to provide value to others, which coincidentally increasing your own. Like business itself, being a connector is not about managing transactions, but about managing relationships.
He is talking about the real networking is about finding ways to make other people more successful. It is about working hard to give more than you get. I couldn’t agree more about that. This is a life principle.
Notes from the Book
Create a Relationship Action Plan
- Set goals for every 3 months and year, 3 years out.
- Identify the people, places, and things required to meet those goals.
- Reach out to the people who can help you achieve your goals.
Create a board of advisors to act as cheerleaders and supervisors
- Be bold and willing to ask; it never hurts to ask.
- Become an active member in clubs, and work up to being a leader.
- Meet 1 new person per week, no matter where or how.
- Research people before meeting them to find common interests.
Four rules of warm calling:
- Convey credibility by mentioning a familiar person or institution
- State your value proposition — It’s all about them. What can you do for them?
- Impart urgency and convenience by being prepared to do whatever it takes whenever it takes to meet the other person on his or her own terms
- Be prepared to ofter a compromise that secures a definite follow-up at a minimum.
How do you open the door talking to the big shot?
- Make the gate keeper an ally rather than an adversary.
- Always express your gratitude
- Be sure to include an item of interest from your meeting or conversation – a joke or a shared moment of humor
- Reaffirm whatever commitments you both made – going both ways
- Be brief and to the point
- Always address the thank-you note to the person by name
- Use e-mail and snail mail. The combination adds a personalized touch.
- Timeliness is key. Send them as soon as possible after the meeting or interview
- Many people wait until the holidays to say thank you or reach out. Why wait? Your follow-ups will be timelier, more appropriate, and certainly better remembered.
- Don’t forget to follow up with those who have acted as the go between for you and someone else. Let the original referrer know how the conversation went, and express your appreciation for their help.
Make a connection quickly
- look them in the eyes
- Listen intently
- Ask personal questions
- Reveal your vulnerability
Connect with “superconnectors” (well-connected people outside your profession).
Avoid safe, boring talk. Talk about religion, romance, politics, and your passions.
Listen attentively and use people’s names.
Help people with the 3 most important things: health, wealth, and children.
Become an indispensable power broker, helping others succeed.
Ping your contacts at least a few times each year to stay in touch. Birthdays are the best time.
Throw dinner parties with a mix of people.
Use “anchor tenants” to bridge to others outside your social circle.
Connect with the famous and powerful through organizations, clubs, conferences, fundraisers, nonprofit boards, sports, etc. If you can’t find a club, start one!